And that's curtains

I just don't fucking get it. A man can only try so much and get so little out of something till he just ends up giving up on something. It's like that one stubborn level in a video game or that one piece of furniture you can't put together and you just give up on it only to try your best the very next day. That's how I feel about women and myself. It's like I am in a never ending struggle to find some form of GENUINE affection that I have become cursed for eternity to live this here single life. I know, it may be a better one; but goddamn in my 22 years of living I have never once experienced about what nearly 96% of all the people I have known at some point in their lives. I have had sex before but it was a meaningless romp in the sheets. I was drunk, in a surly daze, and some chick made a beeline for my junk. I've even known a friend who dated some chick for about a week...you know what I would give to have something like that?

I just feel like I would have to literally have to go to the ends of the earth just to find my perfect woman. I mean honestly that's not working out here. For the past nine years I have had nothing but letdowns and broken hearts. Nine fuckin' years of turmoil and disrespect to whatever kindness I show. I just really don't get it. You put in that 100% effort to be with a female and you end up getting .01% back in return. And you know what the real killer is? SHE DOESN'T HAVE A FUCKING CLUE THAT YOU ARE EVEN SHOWING SUCH AFFECTION. She's blindsided by the next dude; arms made of pure steel and brawn, a face of an olympian, the gusto of a Spaniard and the physique of a gladiator. No clue what lurks beneath the surface but it sure as hell isn't anything as to what the other dude feels: actual genuine caring. Maybe I'm the one who is confused as to all of this, but I do make one point; women just don't dig nice, point blank period. Women in general would rather go for someone who is just one third of a good dude and about two-thirds the asshole to others. So I throw in the towel, I lay my hat on the post and casually pretend I never got coasted aside for another dude...again.